Why is it that people spend so much time asking how, and so little time asking why? Did we as kids run out of some predetermined number of "Whys" we had been granted? I know my kids ask me constantly, why dad?, but why? ... Why after why, after why? Nothing unusual, I am sure you did it to your parents, I know I did it to mine ... The question is why did we stop? I am often asked for advice about starting a business, and in the early days would jump in and try to help. I'd give support, and maybe some direction, until I noticed how few people actually did something. I still helped, but only if the person was genuinely committed, as I had become frustrated with this inaction. But then I realised what the reason was.

I started asking questions

"Excellent, why?" ... A blank look is returned ... "Why, do you want to start a business?" ... "To make money ... and get rich" ... "Why?" ... "Why what? ... "Why do you want to be rich" ... "So I can give my family a great life, so that we can have stuff" ... "Why do you want that?" ... "So that we can be happy."

But that's failed logic

At this point I understand their desire, but I also know I am talking to someone that is not going to be an entrepreneur ... In fact they are probably never going to be truly happy until they find a better answer to "Why", and until they learn to ask why for themselves. You see, it's a failed logic, money won't make you happy. In fact maybe all this person needs to do to be happy is to lower their expectations about money, to build a story around why they don't need money, why money is wrong and why working that hard would take them away from what's important ... like family. The truth is however, that won't make them happy, that will just make them numb. Happiness will only come through connection to a higher purpose ... if you, like "one's destiny" ... it comes from contribution.

At the end of this post I have linked to an interview with entrepreneur Michael Hill (Jeweller) from a National Radio show this morning. He made an awesome comment that I believe supports this:"When you are in harmony, you don't want to take, you want to give."

Observation #1

Have you ever noticed how many successful blogs are about how to be a successful blogger?. And if they are not about blogging then they are often a "how to" site, maybe with tech tips etc. What about these for example? How to become a popular blogger or How to become wealthy right now and 5 ways to 'systemize' your blogging. Before I start a fire storm, I'm not criticising these sites. I think they are awesome and have great stuff to share, but what about the question ... Why? ... Why do you want to be a successful blogger? Why is this information right for you? Written goals a good, but they are exponentially more powerful when you add a 'WHY?' to each item. A deeply considered and deeply felt why ... a deeply considered connection to that higher purpose. These blogs will give you a strategy once you are moving, but this connection to purpose will be the fuel for your fire.

Observation #2

I was at a course last week, and sat for most of the week at the back of the room. I noticed that a large proportion of the room were hurriedly writing notes, trying to take down every detail – they needed to make sure they captured the strategy perfectly ... A smaller group didn't take many notes, what they seemed to record was not the strategy verbatim, but ideas that connected with what they already knew ... they recorded the inspiration. What I found interesting was: the group that took the notes hadn't started a business yet or were struggling. In fact many of these people, without wanting to be unkind, will probably never start. They are trying to educate themselves a safety net and of course without an empowering "Why", no safety net will ever be good enough. The second group however, didn't need a safety net as they were so well connected. They had turned their 'why?', into a 'why the hell not?' as if to say, 'what else is there?'

I guess I am reminded today

If we want to change our destiny, if we want to change our life's direction, if we want to grow beyond where we are now then we must always explore why? NB I came across a blog recently that I am starting to love called mixergy.com. What I love is how Andrew really trys to dig deep in his interviews, sometimes to the point of making the interviewee a little uncomfortable. He passionately explores the 'Why?' behind what the person does, and do they live what they 'say'. Have a look, I particularly enjoyed these two interviews, one with Seth Godin on Why You Need To Lead A Tribe and How Alltop Is Growing By Following Its Founder’s Advice – The Guy Kawasaki Interview

Interview on New Zealand National Radio with Michael Hill Jeweller